Omaira | Photo by Syed Shahriyar
Srinagar: Every Friday, Mohsina and Omaira, both in their early 20s, meet before afternoon prayers at Nazir Ahmed’s house in Dalgate, an old neighbourhood in Srinagar, where they are joined by a few others, including Amin. All of them then offer prayers before settling down to endless rounds of tea, and conversations about life, death, love and everything in between.
Friday is the only day they get to meet. The rest of the week they work as ‘matchmakers’ – a gender-specific job assigned to transgender people in Kashmir – or perform at weddings. Although, as more and more people are finding partners for themselves, Omaira feels there is no future in the matchmaking business. Both she and Mohsina have tried to get a job at a parlour, but nobody was willing to hire them.
Omaira and Mohsina met only a few months ago and struck up a good rapport, given that they are of a similar age. They even look different from the others in the group, and their way of thinking is different too. The others in the group like Nazir, 42, and Amin, 48, are much older and wear the traditional Kashmiri attire for men (Khan dress), with the length of their hair till their ears. Omaira and Mohsina, on the other hand, have long hair and wear jeans and t-shirts. They wanted more from life than to fix marriages; they wanted to study further and get better jobs.
Mohsina has studied till the 12th grade before she decided to quit, “I wanted to do hotel management after school but I wasn’t comfortable with being in a place where I had to pretend to be someone I wasn’t,” she said. “I chose to be a matchmaker instead, because with them I can be myself without the fear of being judged.” Her parents are not happy with her work, her long hair, or the clothes she chooses to wear, but they have accepted the way she wants to live her life.
Omaira did not have much option but to quit school after qualifying for the 10th grade. She says she didn’t feel right at school after that year, and her family did not help either. Her father and elder brother stopped talking to her after she was found dressing in her mother’s clothes and wearing her make-up.