C+ | RM Naeem (ink and acrylic)
Disposal was to be done through mobile disposal units — much like the garbage trucks that prowl through cities every night. In this case, after the deviating EoSs log out, they die as a result of a deep sensation of depression which would cause either a stroke or a haemorrhage — or both. After this, disposal teams would move in, unlock the codes on the computerised lock systems on apartment doors and houses — since now every single home conforms to this building standard. The disposal teams would pick up the bodies and throw them into the garbage truck to be taken to a disposal site for instant incineration.
Our people were horrified when this news broke. No attention to detail at all! In comparison, our entire proposal was so much better! Much more cost efficient. Of course, it was. We were the ones who had designed and implemented the happiness index monitoring system. Hello! An efficient measure of success linked to each bank account: happiness. And the social media comment forwarding thing. Our proposal for monitoring was just as elegant and relevant. A much more sure-fire way of logging out, without any risk of failure.
A two-step approach — if step one, which resembled XNexSt’s approach, failed, step two would kick in. In this phase, an added dose of subliminal messaging would persuade the EoS to click on the firearm and on the body bag facsimile option and then walk out of their dwellings to a point of pick up, PoP. Then on the sighting of the approaching disposal truck, the EoS would get into the body bag and shoot himself.
Plus our proposal used garbage trucks which had built-in functions for separating bones, blood and flesh. We had pilot tested the process in several locations when the opportunity had presented itself. And another one was coming up. Soft drinks are not the only product testing that follow our troops! Hello?! Our system took the waste product and immediately disposed of it by incineration, creating fuel for heating while the rest of the waste product was turned to compost for organic farms. It contributed to a green economy.
As we noted in our proposal, our firm was 100 per cent minority-owned and run. Our happiness index was well off the charts: in the top one per cent of the top quintile. It was an airtight case. So for this to have gone to someone else — was a travesty. We are planning a strong protest. Such injustice has to be resisted.
This article was published as part of a special editorial project '2016 In Broad Strokes' for the Herald's Annual 2017 issue. To read more subscribe to the Herald in print.
The writer is a novelist and short story writer with four published books.
The artist is a graduate of the National College of Arts, Lahore.